Before you face your fear

There is one indisputable way to defeat fear and that is by facing the fear. We all have fears that we must at one time or the other either face or be confronted by. It takes courage and more to face your fear, this I think is good. He is not wise who waits until he is confronted by his fears. It is not uncommon for people to avoid their fears or problems thinking that in so doing they escape it. No, you don’t escape a problem by avoiding, you do by solving it.

Whether you face your fears or it confronts you, one of two things is sure. You either conquer it or you fall in defeat at its feat. That is not what you want is it? If any fear must be conquered, one way or the other it must first be confronted. There are two stages about fear as it relates to this post, the first is confronting it and the other is getting to conquer it. Before you face your fear, here are some tips that can help.

1.    Decide to face your fear: there is nothing as powerful and effective in conditioning your mind for the task as a decision to face your fear. Many people want to face their fears but have not made any real decision to do so. Many people like to confront their problems, they think about it, they wish they could, they even desire opportunity to face it. But nothing favorably remarkable really happens until one makes the decision to face the fear. Without this, you are yet to state your stand, that alone sends a signal which I strongly believe attracts every opportunity and event that tends to more fear which eventually prevents you from confronting the main fear or problem in a manner that solves it. Don’t just intend to face your fear, endorse your intention with a firm decision.

2.    Commit to your decision: responsibility begets commitment. You have decided to face your fear; that singular decision would basically create a responsibility on your path towards achieving your goal. You now have some thing to commit to. But commitment doesn’t just hold because you want to commit to something.  You have to be realistic with issues. Have worthy basis that back your decision to commit to your course. Consider the terms and turns about your commitment, which will give clarity of purpose.  Don’t leave your commitment floating on baseless heights as such commitments don’t live long to achieve their purpose.

3.    Work it: what happens after you commit to confront your fears? William H. Murray puts it well in saying that the moment one definitely commits oneself then providence moves too. All sort of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issue from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and material assistance which no man would have dreamed would come his way. As Murray acknowledged, your decision and commitment brings all sorts of opportunity in your favor but what is opportunity when you fail to use it? What really brings you face to face with your fear is working the work. Most people decide and commit to things but don’t get ahead working towards it. We should withdraw from the idea of wanting to get lucky at everything; nature reserves little or no luck for one who will not work to earn it. You begin to get really lucky when you start working. Yes luck comes with work and most people miss out on luck because they don’t like work. Who was it again that said the harder I work, the luckier I get? Well, he’s every bit correct.

As much as you would want to conquer your fears and advance with your affairs in life, you must first cross the bridge of facing the fear. There are no two ways about conquering fears, other than taking a decision to face it which is a conscious intentional act. On the contrary, if you allow your fear to confront you (as it will most certainly do when you avoid it) for not deciding to face it, you loose that sense of control over the situation. There is a sense of control and confidence that comes with intentionally going after something rather than something coming after you, not just with fears alone. You become more confident and in control when you are proactive, taking the initiative to do things rather than being told to. That I think is a good way about handling fear. Make a strong decision to confront your fear, commit to that decision and work towards it by actually doing that which you otherwise think you can’t. Confront your fear and face the future with courage.