Before you face your fear

There is one indisputable way to defeat fear and that is by facing the fear. We all have fears that we must at one time or the other either face or be confronted by. It takes courage and more to face your fear, this I think is good. He is not wise who waits until he is confronted by his fears. It is not uncommon for people to avoid their fears or problems thinking that in so doing they escape it. No, you don’t escape a problem by avoiding, you do by solving it.

Whether you face your fears or it confronts you, one of two things is sure. You either conquer it or you fall in defeat at its feat. That is not what you want is it? If any fear must be conquered, one way or the other it must first be confronted. There are two stages about fear as it relates to this post, the first is confronting it and the other is getting to conquer it. Before you face your fear, here are some tips that can help.

1.    Decide to face your fear: there is nothing as powerful and effective in conditioning your mind for the task as a decision to face your fear. Many people want to face their fears but have not made any real decision to do so. Many people like to confront their problems, they think about it, they wish they could, they even desire opportunity to face it. But nothing favorably remarkable really happens until one makes the decision to face the fear. Without this, you are yet to state your stand, that alone sends a signal which I strongly believe attracts every opportunity and event that tends to more fear which eventually prevents you from confronting the main fear or problem in a manner that solves it. Don’t just intend to face your fear, endorse your intention with a firm decision.

2.    Commit to your decision: responsibility begets commitment. You have decided to face your fear; that singular decision would basically create a responsibility on your path towards achieving your goal. You now have some thing to commit to. But commitment doesn’t just hold because you want to commit to something.  You have to be realistic with issues. Have worthy basis that back your decision to commit to your course. Consider the terms and turns about your commitment, which will give clarity of purpose.  Don’t leave your commitment floating on baseless heights as such commitments don’t live long to achieve their purpose.

3.    Work it: what happens after you commit to confront your fears? William H. Murray puts it well in saying that the moment one definitely commits oneself then providence moves too. All sort of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issue from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and material assistance which no man would have dreamed would come his way. As Murray acknowledged, your decision and commitment brings all sorts of opportunity in your favor but what is opportunity when you fail to use it? What really brings you face to face with your fear is working the work. Most people decide and commit to things but don’t get ahead working towards it. We should withdraw from the idea of wanting to get lucky at everything; nature reserves little or no luck for one who will not work to earn it. You begin to get really lucky when you start working. Yes luck comes with work and most people miss out on luck because they don’t like work. Who was it again that said the harder I work, the luckier I get? Well, he’s every bit correct.

As much as you would want to conquer your fears and advance with your affairs in life, you must first cross the bridge of facing the fear. There are no two ways about conquering fears, other than taking a decision to face it which is a conscious intentional act. On the contrary, if you allow your fear to confront you (as it will most certainly do when you avoid it) for not deciding to face it, you loose that sense of control over the situation. There is a sense of control and confidence that comes with intentionally going after something rather than something coming after you, not just with fears alone. You become more confident and in control when you are proactive, taking the initiative to do things rather than being told to. That I think is a good way about handling fear. Make a strong decision to confront your fear, commit to that decision and work towards it by actually doing that which you otherwise think you can’t. Confront your fear and face the future with courage.

Power to effect change

The future that we will eventually live is not formed by means of wishes or desire but they are created by the decisions of today as well as their corresponding actions. It’s a true saying that the life we live today is a sum total of the decisions we made yesterday. How powerful can these eight letter word - decision be?
The power in the eight letter word – decision has not ceased to prove its efficacy to those who use it wisely as well as those who don’t, but with different outcomes. You are wise if you understand that life works in seasons. Most people work out their lives calling all sorts of unnecessary and unwarranted palaver because they lack the knowledge of this fundamental truth – things happen in their seasons.

I appreciate the art and science of farming, it’s a beauty observing a wise and diligent farmer, he sure understands seasons. On the other side of the matter, you will rightly observe that the world is getting faster by the moment, everybody wants the next thing now (well, who won’t, if they have the means to) even before its due season. Most people strive for such getting not really because it’s a serious need they can’t do without, this is the conscious voluntary aspects of the matter. The unconscious dimension of it is that such people do not really understand time and seasons.

The subject is quite important in determining success or failure. Most people do so much, breaking, pulling, shoving and striving to achieve various desires. Of course the possibility allows that anyone can achieve anything if they choose and work towards it. But when things are done out of their seasons progress may turn out to be only temporal.

It’s amazing how things change, in just a moment, with just one decision, at the pull of a switch. There is one switch everyone goes around with, at the pull of which you can dramatically transform situations and indeed your world. But how can you do that? And what sort of switch could that be? Conditions are controlled by seasons? When seasons change, other related or sub facilities follow suit. The good thing here is that you can change the seasons that determine your situations, as everyone can. This is one remarkable virtue possible to man. Decisions create seasons. Decision is that switch available to anyone to practically change situations. The disparity of opportunity that comes to people can be directly attributed to the difference in their decisions. Decisions create seasons. Control the seasons of your life by pulling the right switch.

Press for improvement

Man has always sought to develop himself, his surrounding and his life in general. That trend has not ceased. It is natural in man to grow as well as find exciting and efficient ways of doing things. Creativity here is the idea and ability to improve situation and do things in better ways. The instincts to always improve are there but it can also just remain there. The important question is how to stir it and put it to beneficial use. The need for creativity is higher than ever, and though time may be short, it always leaves an opportunity to improve. One can remain at a level without improvement for decades but for the books one reads and the people one meets. I know you don’t want that, you want to improve with every moment and become the best possible. I have identified some tips that can help you form the habit of conscious steps towards improvement.

1. Show concern: it all starts here; building a habit of improvement begins by showing concern. Nothing can be attempted with an indifferent attitude. It’s disturbing to stay around people who show absolutely no concern to what’s happening in their immediate environment. Such people are categorized under the groups of people who wait for things to happen. People who solve problems don’t do it because they have a special knack for problem solving. Albert Einstein in one his responses said “I’m not a genius; I only stick with problems longer”. Solving problems begins with identifying a need and showing some concern, that singular act of showing concern can spark a flurry of ideas as to solving the problem. Anybody can identify a problem but not everyone shows concern. Show some concern to improve the situation when there is no obvious problem to solve, ask you what can be improved upon and eventually when situation calls for improvement you won’t need the highest level of consciousness to identify it and respond.

2. Think possible: if you will think anyway, why not think possible? You lose nothing thinking possible; consciously nurture the thought that improvement is possible. Some people keep limiting their possibility to the standard their past has set for them. They whine to themselves- oh this’d best it has ever got with me. Since I got the idea that there is always a possible way of going about anything, I have nurtured and applied that thought to various life situations and it’s always proved helpful. A fool says it can never be done (perhaps because it has never been done) until someone comes around and does it. When a wise person has a problem he can’t solve, he doesn’t shelve it and throw the keys. He thinks to himself, I may not have the solution to this problem but someone a little bit clever than I may. Time and again events have proven that there is always a possible way about anything.

3. Be the change: the term change alone sparks a lot of feelings in different people, some detest it, some enjoy the challenge and opportunity it brings, and some others don’t just care. But the truth in its crude form remains – no change, no growth, and no improvement. Change – whether you like it or not, you will still experience its effect (nobody is immune to it). Become the catalyst of the improvement you want to experience in and around you. Change as we want it should not be determined by external influence. But lasting and effective change should start from within; it should be a product of our own conscious decision.

You can’t possibly be a solution to a problem you show no concern over. If you will think any way, think possible, think big. If you want to see any change, you might as well start it.